Never Gonna Let You Go
by Mrs.DeanWinchester99
Summary: Braelynn was forced into the hunting life by her father when she was young. Growing up with the Winchesters, her father worked with John to avenge their wive's deaths. She was fourteen when he died, and by eighteen she was gone. But now, the Winchesters are back and she has to decide if family is worth abandoning her entire life. And what about her feelings for a certain hunter?


"Uggh, what now?" Braelynn groaned as the doorbell sounded through the house. Pulling her black suit jacket on over the maroon camisole she had on, she smoothed her black pencil skirt down and quickly slipped on a pair of shiny, black pumps. Tightening her high ponytail, she made a last glance in the mirror to make sure she looked okay before racing downstairs to answer the door. "Yeah, don't bother getting it," she said to Ryan, one of her roommates. He was sitting in his room, video game controller in his hand.

"I'm kinda busy," he called after her, not taking his eyes off the screen.

"Yeah, cause it's not like I'm late for my first day of my internship or anything," Brae mumbled under her breath. The day had been hectic and she had barely had any time to catch her breath. Being a college student was definitely not all partying and drinking.

The doorbell rang again and Brae called, "I'm coming, would you hold on just a sec?" Grabbing the doorknob, she twisted and pulled it open. She had planned on giving the visitor a piece of her mind but her words caught in her throat as she saw who it was. Brae stood there with her mouth open. There was her family, standing there looking much different from the last time she'd seen them. When was the last time she'd called? It must be going on two years now.

"Hey Brae," the tall one said, giving her a sympathetic smile. She looked up at him with wide eyes. She didn't remember him being that tall and now she barely came up to his chest. "I know we're probably the last people you wanna see, but we really need to talk to you. Would it be alright if we come in and explain?"

"Uh, sure Sammy," she answered after taking a few seconds to get her mouth to work. "Come on in." She stepped aside to let them walk past and closed the door behind them. Following them into the living room, she took a seat on the couch in front of the picture window. Brae looked at them again and tried not to let her jaw drop. Here in front of her were the Winchesters- three people she had really thought she'd never see again.

Brae's situation was pretty complicated. When she was six months old her mother had died in the same manner as Sam and Dean's. After that, her father had gone slightly mad and became obsessed with finding the thing that had killed his wife. It wasn't long after that he got a call from John about Mary. John and Brae's father had been old war buddies and now they had another thing in common. The two men had met up and decided their chances of finding the monster were better if they worked together.

From that point on, Braelynn had grown up with the Winchester boys. She was only a month older than Sam, and Dean was a few years older. They had become her family and with them, the three kids grew up in the hunter life. When Brae was about eleven, her father started taking her out on hunts. Dean, who still stayed back to watch Sam, was furious because he wanted to go with them. He claimed that not only was he older, but he was a better fighter than Brae. I mean, she was a girl for Pete's sake. What could she do that he couldn't do better? But John insisted Dean stay to take care of Sam and that was that.

Brae was fourteen when it happened. She had stayed back to watch Sam because at this point, John was taking Dean on hunts. It was late when John and Dean stumbled into the motel room, bloody and battered. Brae looked at them and asked where her father was. But he would never again come back from a hunt. It was hard for her to deal with her father's death, but she managed. She had never been extremely close with her father and he never really took very good care of her.

Before she knew it, they were off on the next hunt as if nothing had ever happened. Brae had never gotten along with John and now that her father was gone, it got worse. She blamed him and her father for dragging her and the boys into this life that they never wanted. Brae would scream at the top of her lungs, saying how much she wanted a normal life and hated that she had to live like this. The fights got so bad that sometimes Dean would have to drag Brae away before things got physical.

When Brae turned eighteen she had gone off to college without a backwards glance. She'd done very well in school and had made it into one of the top colleges in the country. She was happy now, but as she looked at the Winchesters, she started second guessing that.

"Sam, is everything alright?" she asked, looking at him. He had definitely grown up since she last saw him. He was tall and the look in his eyes told Brae that everything was clearly _not_ alright.

Glancing over at Dean, she scolded herself when her heartbeat sped up. She had never really seen him as the brother figure she saw Sam as. He had always been something more to her and the only one that knew that was Sam. Dean's apple green eyes were currently looking around the room as he took in his surroundings. Feelings she had pushed down deep were threatening to come to the surface, so she tore her gaze away from Dean to look at Sam again.

"Not exactly," he said. "A lot has happened since you left."

"What's going on? Sammy, you were out and now you're back in the life? We worked so hard to get out. Did you really throw it all away?" Brae asked, confusion filling her face.

"I didn't want to, believe me," he said, his eyes almost pleading with her. "But the thing that killed our moms… It killed Jess."

"Oh my God!" Brae exclaimed. She quickly stood up and wrapped her brother in a hug. "Why would it go after her?"

"We don't know, but that's what we're trying to figure out."

"This is really touching and all, but we don't really have time for a family reunion," John said, looking at Brae angrily. That look sparked Brae's anger and she stood up, giving him a look of her own.

"Don't you dare come into my house and try bossing me around," she growled. "I wouldn't take orders from you as a kid and I sure as hell won't now. You're not my boss."

"Brae, don't start," Dean said, frowning at her. It was the first time he'd spoken. Her gaze darted to him. He had matured since she'd last seen him. His muscles were more defined and easily seen through the t-shirt he was wearing, and his face was carved out, giving him an amazing jawline. But no matter how much she noticed about him, his comment still pissed her off. She had forgotten how much John could anger her.

"And of course, Dean will defend him like the good wittle soldier he is," she shot at him. "Sorry that I don't obey him like you do. I actually have a mind of my own."

"Yeah, you made that perfectly clear when you left," Dean shot back, glaring at her. Brae was caught off guard and couldn't think of anything to say.

"Enough!" Sam exclaimed. He looked at Brae and said, "We didn't come here to start a fight."

"Then why did you come, Sam?" she asked, exasperation in her tone. "Look, I was already late for my first day at my internship and now I'll be lucky if they still keep me on. So either tell me what you want or get out so I can leave." She felt terrible for taking her anger out on Sam, but she had to hurry this along. At this rate they'd be arguing till dark.

"We need your help finding it. We finally have a way to kill the thing," Sam told her. He seemed happy, almost excited. Brae took that as a really bad sign.

Sam leaned in close to her ear and whispered, "I really need you in this. You know how Dean is around dad and I don't think I can take much more of them on my own."

Brae wanted to say no. She had gotten herself out of the hunting she had hated so much. She wanted to tell them all to go to hell and deny them her life. Brae had made so many friends here at college and was learning so much. And there was also her internship to think about. Leaving would ensure that she could never go back to having the normal life she always wanted. She didn't owe them anything. But in reality, Brae knew the truth. She owed them everything. The Winchesters had took her in when she had no one else. Even when her father was alive, he had never really paid attention to her. John had at least made sure she had clothes and food. Dean had practically raised her and his brother, and Sam had always been her emotional support. There was no guarantee that she'd even be alive if it weren't for them.

Sighing, she looked up at Sam and said, "You better tell me what you boys have been up to. I have to get packing." Sam smiled, brightening his whole expression, and wrapped Brae in a hug.

"Thank you," he whispered in her ear.

"Follow me," she said after breaking off the hug. She made her way up the worn wooden stairs, heels clicking. Ryan looked up as she passed his open door and frowned.

"I thought you were leaving," he said. When he saw Sam his eyes widened in shock. "Who's your friend?"

"Ryan, this is my brother Sam," Brae explained. "Sam, Ryan, my roommate." She pushed her bedroom door open and looked around. Pictures documenting the past two years of her life covered the walls. They showed Brae and her friends doing all sorts of activities. Now she was leaving and would never see them again.

Sam came in and sat on her bed. "So what's with the fancy getup?" he asked, gesturing to her suit.

"I was supposed to start my internship today. That's where I was headed before you guys came aknockin'."

"Internship for what?"

"I'm studying psychology and criminal justice. I was going to shadow a criminal profiler and kinda get a feel for what it's like to work in the field."

"wow, that's amazing."

"Yeah, it would've been." There was a tinge of sadness in Brae's voice and Sam gave her an apologetic look. She went into her closet and grabbed a pair of black jean shorts and a black tank top. Quickly changing, she grabbed a purple flannel and threw it on before stepping back into the bedroom.

"Now there's the Brae I know," Sam commented as she took her hair down, giving her a friendly smile. She gave one back to him. No matter what, Sam had always been able to cheer her up.

"So start talking," she stated as she pulled a large duffel bag out from under her bed. "What have you and Deany-poo been up to?"

Sam started explaining what had happened while Brae stuffed all her clothes in the bag. He paused as she went to the bathroom to get her hygiene products. It wasn't until he started talking about a demon named Meg that she interrupted him. "Since when do we deal with demons?:" she asked. "I mean, we never really got into that kind of thing."

"Lately we haven't really had a choice. A demon killed our mothers and we're gonna have to do things we don't normally do to finish this."

Brae sat down next to him. She was finished packing; all that she had left was her laptop and charger. She rested her head on his shoulder and sighed. "I just don't see the need to kill it. With everything that we've given up already for the opportunity, I don't really see revenge being worth it."

"It's just gonna keep killing people until we take it down. By killing the demon we'll be saving countless lives. We can prevent others from going through what we had to."

"I know," Brae admitted with a sigh. "I just wish that responsibility didn't have to fall on us." She stood up and put her laptop into its case. When that was finished, she slung the strap over her shoulder and looked at Sam.

"Here, I'll carry your bags," he offered. Looping his hand through the handles, he picked them up and grunted. "Jesus Brae, what do you have in these?"

"You didn't expect me to leave my books behind, did you?" she asked. Sam peered over at her bookshelf and saw that it was practically empty.

"Only you would use a bag to pack just books," he teased. The two of them left her room, Brae giving it one more look before shutting the door. They went downstairs and into the living room where Dean and John were waiting.

"Are you finally ready to go?" John spat at her. Without waiting for a response, he stormed out the front door, the screen door banging shut behind him.

"I swear, I'm gonna end up stabbing him," Brae said, glaring at the door.

"Brae, before we go I have a question," Sam said. She turned to look at him and saw that he looked uneasy. Dean was looking at her, his face neutral. Brae had always hated how he could hide his emotions. Usually she was able to decipher what he was thinking but his mask had gotten better in the past two years.

"What is it?"

"Okay, this is gonna sound crazy but just hear me out. Do you have any psychic powers or anything of that nature?"

Brae's face drained of color. "How did you know?" she asked, crossing her arms across her chest.

"Wait, so you do?" Dean asked. HIs mask was crumbing, worry showing through the cracks.

Brae nodded meekly. Reaching out with her hand, she motioned to the fridge across the room in the kitchen. Flicking her wrist it opened to show the contents inside. Because the house was inhabited by college students, takeout containers and pizza boxes filled the shelves. A bottle of iced tea was in one of the door shelves and Brae flicked her hand towards her. The bottle floated out of the fridge and into her waiting palm. With her other hand, she motioned and the fridge closed again. She opened the bottle of tea and took a drink before looking at the boys again. They were staring at her with wide eyes.

"Telekinesis," Sam whispered in shock.

"Yep," Brae said nonchalantly. "Well, we better get going before daddy dearest has a temper tantrum."

"Do you have to start problems with him all the time?" Dean asked as the three of them walked outside.

"I don't start anything. He just makes everything into a huge fight." Sam and her put her bags in the trunk and Brae said, "Oh Baby, I missed you." She ran a hand along the car, feeling the heat from the sun radiating off the metal. "I should have brought you with me. You'd probably have been treated better then."

"Excuse you, are you saying that I mistreat her?" Dean asked, faking insult.

"No, but I'm positive I could've treated her better," she joked. Opening the passenger side door, she climbed in.

"Hey, who said you can sit shotgun?" Sam asked.

"We can all fit up here. I'll sit in the middle." She patted the seat on either side of her and the boys got in. Dean started the car and it rumbled to life. Brae had really missed that sound. She had also missed the smell the car carried: leather and the faint scent of gunpowder. Dean's cologne was also mixed in- something Brae had always loved. The radio came on too, blasting some classic rock song. "Uggh, can we listen to something from this century?" Brae questioned. She flicked the station to one of her favorites.

She started jamming to the music but soon stopped when the song was cut off. "Hey, I was listening to that!" she protested as Dean put his music back on.

"Too bad, I'm not listening to that crap. Now this is what I call good tunes." He turned the radio up as Brae started to say a retort. She tried shouting over the music but it didn't work so she pushed the off button.

"I'm sorry, I don't think I heard you correctly," Brae said. "I thought I heard you say that was good music. I must be mistaken."

"No, you heard correctly," Dean said as he started to pull away from the house and follow John.

"Sam, back me up here." Brae looked to her right but Sam held his hands up in mock surrender.

"I'm not getting anywhere near this fight."

Dean and Brae continued to argue over who had better music taste, but it wasn't angry arguing. They were just having fun. Soon both of them ran out of things to say and Brae realized how tired she was. The sun had set and they were driving down a long highway. There weren't any streetlights and the only light was coming from the Impala's headlights. "I really missed you guys," Brae said after a period of silence. "I guess I never really let myself stop to think about it, but life without you guys kinda blows."

"We missed you too, Brae," Sam said. Brae rested her head on his shoulder and he put his arm around her. She took her thick rimmed glasses off and stashed them in her purse sitting on the ground in front of her. A yawn overtook her and she snuggled into Sam more.

"Someone's tired," Dean commented, a hint of humor in his voice. "Get some rest, Brae. We'll be driving for a while."

"I love you guys," she whispered, already falling asleep. "And I really missed you."

"Now we have you back," Dean said quietly. "And this time, I'm not letting you go." His voice was too quiet for Brae to hear what he said, but Sam did. He looked at his brother in shock but Dean's expression told him not to press the issue. They drove on and Brae fell asleep with her two favorite people beside her.

Braelynn woke up in a cheap motel room with a spring digging into her back. Groaning, she sat up and rubbed her eyes. The room was dark but she noticed there was an outline of light around the blinds in front of the window. It wasn't very strong, leaving her to believe it was early morning. Deciding she wasn't going to be able to sleep with the loose spring right in the middle of the mattress, she got up and walked over to the table sitting in front of the window.

She rummaged through her purse and found her phone. The red light in the top corner was blinking at her, demanding to be plugged in. It took Brae a few moments to find the charger but when she did, she plugged it into the wall. The clock read seven thirty and Brae sighed. She was still on the same sleep schedule for her morning classes and it seemed her body wasn't about to let her sleep in.

' _Well, I guess I can make the most of this extra time,'_ Brae thought to herself. She looked to her right and saw Sam asleep in a bed identical to hers. He barely fit on the mattress, his feet almost poking off the bottom. Brae quietly walked across the room to the bathroom. She closed the door and flicked the light switch on. The space was bathed in a sickly, yellow light, making her look like she had some kind of skin disease.

As she started the water and undressed, Brae's thoughts drifted to Sam. It amazed her that she had been able to go so long without seeing him. Ever since she was a teenager, Brae had dealt with a mild form of depression. For the most part, she was able to keep it under control but sometimes the feeling of hopelessness overwhelmed her. Sam was always there when that happened, doing whatever he could to try and make her feel better. He understood that sometimes all she needed was a shoulder to cry on.

She even remembered one time that Sam had forced Dean to stay with her when she was feeling especially shitty. He had had to go do research for a case and told Dean to keep Brae company while he was away. She was surprised when Dean suggested they watch a movie and she ended up falling asleep on him in the middle of it.

The hot water washed over her as she stepped into the bathtub. She washed her body and hair and was soon stepping out, hair hanging limply down her back. She grabbed one of the towels sitting on the shelf above the toilet and wrapped it around her body. Brae then stepped out and went over to her bag to grab some clothes. As she was rummaging through, she heard shuffling behind her and turned to see Sam sitting up and running a hand over his face.

"Morning sunshine," she greeted him, turning back to her task.

"What time is it?" he questioned, rubbing the sleep from his eyes.

"About eightish. How'd you sleep?" Brae grabbed the clothes she wanted to wear and stood up, hugging them to her chest to keep the towel from slipping off.

"As well as you can in a shitty motel like this," he answered honestly. "You?"

"I had a spring in my back all night." She could actually feel the spot in her lower back where it had poked her; it hurt every time she moved a certain way. Great, that's exactly what she needed when faced with another day of driving.

Sam made a face, showing he sympathized with her. "Well, I'll let you finish up in the bathroom. I'm gonna go check on Dad and Dean." He stood up and walked over to the door. "Do you need anything?" he asked as he turned the doorknob and pulled the door open.

"Coffee would be great," Brae responded. "A good amount of sugar and a touch of cream." She gave him a thankful smile as he left and then entered the bathroom again. Her outfit consisted of some light-colored jean shorts and a light pink t-shirt with the words 'Wild and Free' printed in thin, black lettering. She put her clothes on and quickly applied some light makeup. Lastly, she took a brush to her tangled locks until her hair was free of knots. The dark red color of her hair paired nicely with her pale skin as it passed over her shoulders and tickled the small of her back. It was straight for the most part, with a slight wave to it that added just the right amount of body and definition.

When she was finished getting ready, she went back into the room to pack up her things. As she stuffed her dirty clothes in the bag, the door opened and the two Winchester brothers walked in. Sam was still in pajamas and carrying a coffee cup with steam coming out of the hole in the lid. Dean came in behind him dressed in a tight black t-shirt and jeans. "You're my hero," Brae said to Sam as he handed her the steaming cup of coffee. She took a small sip and sighed in satisfaction.

"I don't think I've ever seen you get up this early of your own free will," Dean teased, sitting down in one of the chairs set around the table.

"I'm still on schedule for my morning classes," Brae said in her defense. She stood up and stretched, closing her eyes as she did. Dean took in her appearance and his eyes traveled up and down her body. He quickly looked away when she looked at him. "What are you even doing in here? Daddy dearest doesn't have any tasks for you to do?"

"Clearly neither of you have grown out of your sarcasm," Dean grumbled, giving Brae a dirty look. Normally it wouldn't be such a big deal, but Brae caught something more malicious in his gaze. It caused her to step back. Dean must have noticed because he quickly softened his expression.

"Anyways," Dean continued, "We're leaving in about an hour. It's gonna take about two hours to get to Iowa." He turned to Brae with a lopsided grin. "So, think you're ready to gank some monsters?" he questioned.

"Oh darling," Brae answered, "I've been out of the game for two years and I'm still a better hunter than you."

"Yeah right. You have never and will never be a better hunter than yours truly." Dean stood up and made his way over to the door. "Now if you'll excuse me, this legendary hunter's gotta go pack." He ducked out the door before Brae could say a comeback.

"Brae, I'm gonna get in the shower," Sam said. "Come and sit in here with me, I need to talk to you." The look on his face said it all as Brae followed him into the bathroom. She was hoping this conversation could've waited just a little longer.

She waited until she heard the shower running before going inside, sitting down on the closed toilet seat. She took a sip of coffee as Sam asked, "So what's it like seeing Dean after all this time?"

Brae cringed. She knew Sam would ask that question eventually, but she had hoped she'd have a little more time, time to figure out an answer to that ominous question. Ever since she'd been a young teenager, Braelynn had had a crush on Dean. At first it had been no big deal, and she had been adamant with Sam that he not say anything to the older Winchester. But as time went on, instead of going away, the feelings got stronger. When she had gone away to college the feelings had died down, but now, seeing him again, they were coming right back to the surface. It was honestly a lot harder for Brae to handle than she'd thought.

"You would think," Brae started, staring at the yellow wall that had probably once been white, "that I'd be over it by now. I mean, it was a stupid crush and after I'd met more guys and stuff that I'd move on."

"But I take it that's not the case?" Sam inquired from behind the shower curtain.

"When I opened that door to see you guys standing on my front porch I was shocked. And then seeing Dean, seeing what he's grown up to become, it's a lot to process. All of the feelings I've had since we were kids are coming back, but this time it's different. We're all grown up now, and I don't know what to do about the things I'm feeling."

"Why don't you tell Dean that?" Sam suggested. He had always been very supportive of Brae's feelings for his brother, and honestly thought they'd get together some day.

"Sam, there's no way he feels the same way. I'm just the annoying little sister."

"Love works in mysterious ways. You never know what could happen," he said cryptically.

"Is there something you're not telling me?" Brae asked, pushing her hair back away from her face.

"No, I just think you're too hard on yourself all the time." The water switched off, ending their conversation as Brae left to let Sam get ready. When she came back into the bedroom she saw Dean sitting at the table, one of her books in his hands.

"Um, excuse you," she said, snatching the book away from him. "Who gave you permission to go through my stuff?"

"What are you reading that fantasy crap for?" he asked as she shoved the novel back into her bag. "Don't you get enough of that in real life?"

"It's a good book. Why do you watch porn, don't you get enough sex being your manwhore self?" The thought of Dean being with some random chick he picked up at a grungy bar hurt, but she brushed it off as best she could.

"That's not the same thing," he remarked indignantly.

Brae threw her empty coffee cup in the garbage and slung her bags over each shoulder. "Of course it isn't," she said mockingly, pinching his cheek as if he were a small child. He pushed her hand away playfully and she giggled before stepping out of the motel room.

The sun was bright and warm as Brae made her way to the car to put her bags in. She was in a great mood and realized that just being around her boys made life a million times better. She turned to go back into the room and help Sam pack when John came out of his room. He frowned when he saw Brae, sending a jolt of anger through her.

"Still here?" John questioned as he put his things in his truck. "I can't believe you didn't bail in the middle of the night. That tends to be your thing."

"It's obvious you don't want me here," Brae stated. "So why'd you even bother coming to get me?"

"Honestly, that's the last thing I wanted. But Dean and Sam insisted we get their precious

Braelynn. If I'd actually thought you'd agree to come I'd have shot them down. But I decided to humor them. Bad decision on my part."

His words stung and Brae fought tears as she shouted, "What did I ever do to you to make you hate me so much?" She didn't want to give John the satisfaction of seeing her cry, but his words cut down deep.

"Don't be so dramatic, I don't hate you. You're the one that insisted you were right all the time and refused to listen to a word I said."

"You ordered us around like we were soldiers!" Brae exclaimed. The yelling had finally attracted the attention of Sam and Dean. They came out of the motel room and stood behind Brae, seeming to assess the situation with worried looks. "We were just kids, John, and you always seemed to think we were more than that."

"You questioned everything I said!" John's voice rose in volume and it was clear that he was getting angry. "You're right, you were kids, which meant that you knew nothing about what you would start fights about. It was impossible to even talk to you without you doing something to intentionally piss me off."

"Have you ever stopped to think that maybe it wasn't me being difficult, but you just being a pretentious dick all the time?"

John's face twisted with rage and he came at her. Brae braced herself for his advance, not letting herself back down. But the confrontation never happened. Dean stepped in between them, back to her, making John stop in his tracks. "Dean, you better move outta my way," John growled, glaring up at his son who had a few inches on him.

"Back away from her," Dean responded in an equally deadly voice. He met his father's glare with one of his own. John tried to move around him but Dean would step in whatever direction his dad did to prevent him from getting any closer to Brae.

"She's barely been here a day and already she's rubbing off on you. You're pathetic, Dean," John spat. He turned and stalked to his truck. "Let's go!" he shouted as he climbed into the driver's seat. "We don't have time for this bullshit."

Dean visibly relaxed and turned to look at Brae. "Are you alright?" he asked, placing a hand on each of her arms. His look was so full of concern that it shocked her into silence for a few moments. She nodded her head and he wrapped his arms around her. She found comfort in his arms, breathing in the scent of his cologne that she loved so much. She could also catch a faint scent of leather. His muscles were firm against her body as she rested her cheek on his chest. If she could've, she'd have stayed like that forever.

"I'm sorry, Dean," she said when she had found her voice again. He leaned back, much to her disappointment, but kept his hands on her arms. "It was a bad idea letting him get me all riled up, but I just-"

"You don't have to apologize, Brae," Dean interrupted. "He was outta line and never shoulda gone after you like that. If he'd have hurt you I-" He stopped, looking down at the ground. Again, Brae didn't know what to say. She had never heard Dean talk about John like that.

"Well, we better get moving," she said after a few moments of silence. "We still got a pretty long drive ahead of us." Dean nodded and went into his room to grab his things. Sam did the same and when he came back out he wrapped Brae in a hug.

"You sure you're alright?" he asked, resting his chin on the top of her head.

"I'm okay. Really, you'd be the first to know if I wasn't." She looked up and smirked at him.

"And I'm sure that hug from Dean helped a lot," Sam joked, giving her a smirk of his own. She lightly punched him in the chest with a roll of her eyes.

After Dean had put his stuff in the car, the three of them got in and pulled out of the parking lot. Brae pulled her knees up to her chest and let her mind wander. The car was quiet, none of them wanting to discuss what lay ahead of them. Brae was starting to feel nerves creep in as she thought of facing a demon. She had of course heard of them, but John rarely ever took on those cases; the few ones he did he'd gone solo, or with her dad before he'd died. Since when had hunting become so complicated? Hunting Weres and such was one thing, but demons were a whole new level of dark and dangerous. All of these thoughts were making her nauseous as her nerves ate away at her, so she pushed her worries out of her mind.

They drove on for a good chunk of time before John pulled over to the side of the road. Dean followed suit and they got out to see what the problem was. Brae stuck close to Dean's side, earning them both a glare from John. "Is everything alright?" Sam asked quickly, trying to avoid another incident.

"Meg called," he stated. "She's killed someone else. If I don't hand over the Colt she said she'll keep killing until I do." John suddenly looked tired, the lines on his face seeming to deepen. "We obviously can't give her the gun, so I'm gonna try and pass a fake off as the real deal."

"So where are we meeting her?" Dean asked.

"We aren't. You three are gonna continue on to Iowa and protect Azazel's next target. I have to do this alone."

"Dad, no!" Dean protested. "She'll kill you!"

"It's a suicide mission," Sam agreed. "If she finds out that you don't have the real Colt you're a goner."

"Boys, I need this to be over," John said wearily. It seemed like he was over what had happened at the motel. "Sammy, I want you to go to college, and Dean, I want you to have a normal life." He turned to Brae, his expression softer than she'd ever seen it when directed at her. "Brae, no matter what you think, I want you to find someone and fall and love. Start a family. I know the life you've had hasn't been easy, but we could end it tonight." He took the Colt out of his waistband and held it out to them. "Now take this, and finish it."

Sam and Dean stared at the gun, neither of them willing to accept the inevitable. Brae could see their struggle and stepped forward, taking the gun out of John's hand. He looked at her and said, "I was kinda rude earlier."

Knowing John, it was the closest thing to an apology she was going to get. "I was out of line too," Brae said, giving him a small smile as she stepped back towards the boys.

"It's time for this to be finished," John continued. "It's all up to you three now." Brae felt a twinge of sadness as she looked at John. No matter how horrible he was to her, or how much she hated him, he had still stepped up and been a father figure when she had become an orphan.

"Dad, you don't have to do this," Sam pleaded, looking helpless to do anything. Brae tucked the Colt behind her and grabbed Sam's hand. She grabbed Dean's hand with her remaining one and gave them both an encouraging squeeze. Dean quickly let go of it and gave her a sideways glare. It took all her willpower to keep her mouth shut about it.

"Yes I do, Sam. We all know if I don't, more people are gonna die." He sighed and rubbed a hand over his face. "I'll call when the job is done." A statement hung in the air, unspoken. If they didn't receive a call, they'd know John had been caught handing over a fake.

John looked at his children for a few moments before turning and getting into his vehicle. The engine roared to life and soon all that was left was a cloud of dust. They stood there and watched him drive away until he disappeared into the horizon.

"We have to get going," Dean stated, void of all emotion. Brae looked up at him worriedly and put a hand on his arm but he just shrugged it off. She wanted to say something, something that would convince them that everything would be okay. But not only would she be lying to them, she'd be lying to herself.

Sam and Brae exchanged a look. They did this often, especially when they were worried about Dean's emotional state. He could become so closed off at times and they both grew concerned as he continued to be stone faced and emotionless. Dean would often say that the two of them had a telepathic connection and they could practically have conversations without speaking a single word. Right now they were showing each other how scared they were- scared of what was to come, scared of what would happen if they failed, and scared most of all for what Dean would do if John died. He'd be a wreck and Brae was scared he'd become completely detached from everything.

But no, she wasn't going to let that happen. She would make sure that her boys were okay, even if it killed her. There was nothing that Brae wouldn't do to keep Dean and Sam safe. She would give up her life in a heartbeat if it meant saving them. She was back for good now. No more college, no normal life. Her boys needed her, and there was no way she was going to turn her back on them now. She'd made that mistake once already and it killed her. She had made her choice. The tables had turned, and now it was time for Brae to return the favor and be strong for them.

As they got into the car, Brae reached up and played with the necklace hanging around her neck. She did this often when she was stressed or worried. The necklace had been a gift from her father when she was about six years old. It had apparently been her mother's and was the only thing of hers that had survived the fire.

The pendant was iron and shaped into a pentagram. What looked like flames surrounded the symbol in a circle, and she had no idea what it meant or stood for. Brae never took it off unless she was showering, and although it was a strange symbol, it had been her mother's. That thought gave her a small sense of comfort, and made it seem like her mother was watching over her and keeping her safe.

Dean started up the car and they continued on their way to Iowa. The day had been an emotional roller coaster and even though she'd only been up for a few hours, Brae felt tired. She rested her head on Sam's shoulder and closed her eyes, the soft sound of music coming from the speakers. She was just drifting off when she heard Sam start speaking. "Dean, did we do the right thing dragging Brae back into this?"

Brae's heart sped up when she heard her name. It was clear that the two boys had thought she'd fallen asleep.

"It was the last thing I wanted to do," Dean said, sounding extremely tired. "She finally had the life she wanted, even if that meant we weren't a part of it."

"You know she didn't leave because of you," Sam said. "Her and dad just couldn't live together anymore. It killed her to know that she was leaving you behind."

"Being without her these past two years has really opened my eyes."

"To what?" Sam asked. His voice held a slight edge to it, indicating he was a little worried.

"I can't do this job without her. I mean, when it was just me and dad there was no fun or excitement at all. The only thing that mattered was getting the job done and moving on to the next one. When I came and got you, it was better. We were able to laugh about things and I realized how much the job sucked without you. But even then, without Brae-" He stopped and a long pause ensued. Brae was about to sit up and ask him to keep going when he said, "She just makes all of this crap bearable. Without her, there's just something missing. She makes me feel like I actually matter and, I don't know. The job's just less sucky with her here."

"Wow Dean," Sam said in shock. "I never knew you felt that way about her." He shifted his position so that his arm was draped across her shoulders, her cheek against his chest. She could feel his chest rise and fall and the fabric of his shirt was soft against her face.

"I guess you could say I've done a lot of thinking lately, and I've come to realize a lot of things," Dean said.

"Like what?" Sam asked, the anticipation easily detectable in his tone.

"I haven't gotten it all figured out yet. It's none of your business anyways." And just like that, Dean shut down again, walls coming up to prevent anyone from seeing inside. Disappointed didn't even come close to what Brae felt at those words. "What did I say about chick flick moments?"

"Oh shut up," Sam groaned in annoyance, but Brae easily picked up on his disappointment.

A million thoughts were swarming her brain as Brae tried to make sense of the conversation she had just heard. Dean was clearly not telling them something and that bothered her. And it seemed that whatever his secret was, it had something to do with her. She just couldn't figure out what. Dean had had major mood swings since they'd walked into her house. One minute it was like he was like he always was, teasing her and happy to have her there. The next minute, it was like he was upset with her about something and didn't want her around. This new information just added to the confusion Brae was feeling. She tried to find answers to the multitude of questions bouncing around in her skull, but quickly gave up. She was going to drive herself crazy trying to figure this mystery out.

Snuggling into Sam's chest, she decided it could wait for another time. She really was exhausted, but she couldn't figure out why. She hadn't been up very long and she figured she'd probably gotten the most sleep out of all of them.

' _You're just not used to this,'_ she thought to herself. Nine hours was a normal amount of sleep for her, and she dreaded to think that now she'd be lucky if she got four or five. Brae had forgotten how hard hunting was, and it wasn't just the killing aspect that drained you. Her thoughts turned back to what lay in her future and she tried to stay positive. Everything was going to work out, and then it'd be over. She blocked all thoughts of demons and Dean out of her head, settling on getting as much rest as she could before the opportunity passed her by.


End file.
